You go to the doctors looking for answers. New symptoms? Get a diagnosis. Everything still running right? Get a checkup. When you hear something is abnormal/wrong it is bittersweet. You think well, at least that explains symptoms XYZ, but then comes the reality that holy shit something is abnormal/wrong. Then the mind takes off in a million directions depending on what information the doctors reveal…or don’t.
With Evan’s appointments we are looking for an all clear for the next part of treatment, but there’s this anxiety built up because the next step is chemo. I feel like there are a million things to do or say to Evan to help him but nothing comes out because there is no right or wrong thing to do or say. Aside from I’m here and I love you.
If you are a family member or friend…or just want to send good vibes…that wants to reach out to let Ev know you’re thinking of him but don’t want to bother him then tell him that. I know people want to know how he is but don’t want to bug, but it is nice to hear you’re thinking of him. I found an article that lists some things you can do to reach out to cancer patients. There’s some good stuff, including things I’m going to try to do. Check it out here. Feel free to contact me too and ask questions here. If it’s too personal, send me a PM on Facebook or something along those lines.
Just waiting for doctors to come in…I know I am helping Evan and am doing everything I can to do so, I just wish there was more I was able to do.
Not to mention that he feels worse today than the day after his shunt surgery…